Good Guy
by Anonymistress
Summary: After Hawk Moth fails again, he begins to question his moral code - is he really a bad guy? And is there anything he can do about it, or is it too late for him to redeem himself?
1. Chapter 1

The window slowly closed, and darkness shrouded the broken man once again. He fell to his knees, whispering the words that would transform him back into his civilian identity. But he wouldn't feel any different.

Nooroo appeared, and was frightened, to see his master this way. He spoke, but Gabriel didn't listen.

Day after day, he sent akumas out of his lair, to get the objects that could - that he so wanted. And day after day, the akumas failed. It was taking its toll on the blond man, who was certain with his first one, the jewels would be his. Now, he was over 30 villains in, and he seemed no closer than he had been on day one. There was no correct way to do it - he just had to pick someone, and hope he was lucky. But Ladybug was always the lucky one. Ladybug... He admired her, her unbreakable spirit, her intelligence. If she wasn't in his way, he would wish her to be an ally. Maybe he could befriend her in his civilian form? But not today.

Chat Noir... He, too, was a formidable opponent, but nothing without Ladybug. Hawk Moth's akumas had controlled the feline hero multiple times, he recounted. If only the same could be said for Ladybug...

Gabriel gripped his chest, stifling the tears that so desperately tried to come out. Nooroo kept talking, and the man was only semi-aware of it. He looked at the reflective floor, into his own eyes...

"Am I a bad guy?" he asked as if realizing it for the first time.

The purple kwami was caught off guard, and hesitated, before answering. "W-well you do hurt innocent people on a daily basis and take advantage of their emotions..."

Gabriel knew this. He nodded slowly. "So... I am. I am a bad guy."

"But! But you don't have to be! It's not too late to change!" Nooroo tried.

The man never looked away from his reflection. He pondered Nooroo's words. Was it too late? Certainly not, he hoped. And if it wasn't... Well... Maybe he could give up the whole supervillain thing. He let out a slow sigh. "If it isn't too late... Will you help me?"

Nooroo squeaked. "O-of course, Master!" He was surprised, but happily so. "What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to help me be a good guy... Like Ladybug. I don't think I want to be the villain anymore," Gabriel admitted, with a small, sad smile, and a tear rolling down his cheek. He stood up tall.

The kwami's eyes widened. "W-well, you could start with trying to improve your relationship with your son... Going to his modeling things, having dinner with him... And since you're not a supervillain anymore, you actually have time to do those things!" Nooroo helpfully suggested with a smile.

The man nodded. "Yes... That sounds good. I'll start with Adrien... I should have never ignored him like that."

"You could also get out of the house more. You never seem to leave this place at all... You could go out with Adrien for lunch sometimes?" Nooroo asked, pleasantly surprised to how well Gabriel was reacting to all this. He was expected to get yelled at, but no, that never happened. Hope was in the little kwami's heart... Could even a supervillain change their ways?

The blond man nodded and smiled. "Sounds like a plan. Tonight, I'll go to dinner with him... Somewhere fancy. Maybe that place that opened, by the river?"

The kwami quickly nodded. "That sounds good!"

"Excellent... See, it's like I'm already a good guy." Gabriel smiled softly. He, too, had hope. He didn't need the miraculous to survive, did he? He just needed Adrien. His son...

* * *

Adrien sat alone at dinner, per usual. He pushed around his food with his fork, waiting for a guest he was sure would never come.

Suddenly, the door opened, and in walked his father. "Sorry I'm late, Adrien," he looked at his boy with a strange face. Something like regret...

The blond boy looked up, surprised. "You... You actually came..."

"We will not be eating here tonight. We have a reservation for somewhere else." Gabriel said, trying not to show how much his son's words hurt him. It was a good thing he had plenty of practice.

Adrien nodded and stood. He hesitated, but the man knew what his son wanted. Gabriel slowly walked over and embraced his son tightly.

The boy was caught off guard, gaping, surprised, before he hugged his father back. He felt like he was about to cry.

"Excuse me, Mr. Agreste?" asked Natalie, raising an eyebrow at her employer.

Gabriel let go and looked at his assistant. "Natalie?"

She graciously smiled softly. "May I speak to you in private?"

He hesitated, before nodding, and following her out of the room, and closing the door behind them.

"I'm confused, sir. I thought your focus was the miraculous. You told me yourself that Adrien could wait until you had them... Unless you already do?" asked Natalie, tilting her head.

The man slowly shook his head. "No, I've decided to take a short break. Adrien is more important than the miraculous... In fact, I need to go out to dinner with him now. Here, take this..." He handed her the butterfly brooch and promptly turned back and walked into the dining room, to find Adrien on his phone.

The boy looked up, a deep sadness, or accusation, in his eyes... Gabriel looked away. "Are you ready?" he asked.

Adrien sighed, put away his phone, and nodded.

"Let's go, then." They walked outside and into the car. Adrien's bodyguard drove them to the restaurant - an upscale, five-star place that neither of them had been to before.

They sat at a table for two, out beside the river. Gabriel got champagne, and Adrien got water. The conversation was stilted - Adrien kept looking at his father strangely. There was no good way to talk to him.

"How is school going, Adrien?" asked the man in another attempt to start a conversation.

The boy shrugged. "Good, I guess..."

Gabriel's brow furrowed. "What's wrong?" he asked, trying to get to the root of the problem.

Adrien sighed. "It's just not the same... Without her. Without mom." He looked ready to cry.

It was like an arrow shot through the man's heart. "Oh," he whispered, staring at his son.

"It's been a year, father... since we last sat down like this. But that last time... She was there. Everything was so much happier then... But now?" He shook his head. "Now, you've been so distant, so far away... I understand that you're grieving, but you're also my father. It's like I didn't just lose my mom that night... I also lost my dad."

Gabriel looked at his hands. He could no longer look at his son. He had failed her... He had failed himself. He wanted to protect Adrien from it all... But it seemed even that backfired on him. There was nothing to be said. How was he supposed to rekindle the relationship he had with Adrien now?

"Thanks for trying... But I think I want to go home now. You can't make me happy with fancy dinners and half-baked attempts at conversation." He stood, and left the area, leaving his broken father behind.

The man stared at his hands still. How could he have messed up so completely? Adrien... How could he have failed his son like that?

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw it - the black butterfly. It wasn't coming for him, no, he went right past him... In the direction that Adrien went.

"Adrien, wait!" the man shouted, running after his son.

The blonde boy stopped, confused, turning to his father. "Huh?" And then he saw the butterfly and let out a gasp.

The little black insect was hot on Adrien's trail - but luckily, Gabriel was faster. He jumped in front of Adrien in the nick of time - and the wicked akuma touched his glasses.

"Father!" yelled Adrien, gasping as the pink outline appeared in front of his face.

Gabriel felt everything around him subside. His son, yelling... It was like it was in another world. Then the voice pierced through, to his consciousness.

 _"Mr. Agreste... Your own son rejected you. You say you want to put him first now, but you must see that it's too late for that. There's only one thing that can right this wrong now..."_

He slowly nodded, and whispered, "the miraculous..."

Adrien began to get even more freaked out, desperately trying to pull the glasses away from his father, fruitlessly trying to break them.

 _"There's only one way to make sure things get done - do them yourself. So, what do you say?"_ the voice asked, so tempting...

"DAD! You can resist... Please..." his son cried, staring into the man's eyes. His son... Adrien had never left his side. The boy might not be as close... But there was hope in those green eyes.

Gabriel closed his eyes and clenched his fists. "No. I say, no." The akuma promptly left his glasses, looking more than a bit surprised.

Adrien looked surprised. "No way..." he stared at the akuma as it drifted away, up into the air. "How did you do that?" he asked, turning back to his father.

The man looked at his son and smiled. "I was going to say yes... But then, I realized, that you were still here. Adrien, my son... I realize now, I should have never shunned you. I only hope you can forgive me..." He lowered his head in shame.

The blond boy embraced him. "I forgive you. Mom might not be here, but we are. And somehow, we gotta get through this..."

"I'd prefer if we did it together," the man said with a smile.

Behind them, suddenly, there was screaming. The duo let go of one another and turned to look - to find an akuma terrorizing people.

Adrien's instincts kicked in and he began to run, only to be caught by the wrist by his father, and practically be dragged to the car. "We're going back home. We'll be safe there," Gabriel explained, fastening his seatbelt.

The boy bit his lip, but said nothing, only having a worried look.

* * *

"Ladybug fights this most recent villain alone and seems to struggle with being alone. Where is Chat Noir? Will he show up at all?" asked the reporter.

Adrien and Gabriel sat on the couch, watching the TV together like they never had before. Adrien shifted uncomfortably. "Dad, I told you, I need to take a shower..."

Gabriel didn't seem to notice, staring at the TV screen. The boy couldn't tell if his father was focused on watching or just staring into space in thought.

"Dad? ...father?" asked Adrien, looking seriously concerned.

The man jolted and quickly turned to his son. "Adrien... I have something important to show you."

Adrien's eyebrows shot up. "What? What is it?"

Gabriel lowered his eyes. "It's... It's a surprise, actually. I'll be right back... Stay here, alright?"

The boy hesitated before nodding. "Of course, father."

"Good..." Gabriel walked to his office, hands held behind his back. He approached the painting, and pressed the secret buttons that would allow him to enter his secret lair. In seconds, he was there - and Natalie stood, cloaked in an outfit very similar to Hawk Moth's.

She seemed surprised. "Mr. Agreste! I didn't think-"

"What do you think you're doing?" he asked, before snatching the brooch from her neck, causing her to detransform.

"Giving you more protection. If Hawk Moth is going to disappear, and you start to interact with your son around the same time, there has to be proof it's just a coincidence," Natalie explained grimly.

Gabriel let out a sigh. She was right, someone might put together the pieces. But he didn't care. "You are never, I say never allowed to use this miraculous without my explicit permission. Is that clear?"

She bowed her head. "Yes, sir."

He shook his head and turned away. "I want you to go check on Adrien. Tell him I'll be right there..."

"Of course, Mr. Agreste," she nodded, and off she went.

* * *

"But he said to stay here!" argued Plagg. "What's he gonna think when you're gone?"

The blond boy shook his head. "That doesn't matter, Plagg. Ladybug needs my help... I'm sorry, dad," he muttered. "Plagg, claws out!" In seconds, Adrien Agreste was replaced by Chat Noir, who subsequently hopped out the window.

Getting to the scene of the right was a cinch as he had seen the road signs on the TV. Quickly, he found a troubling sight - Ladybug trapped in a makeshift metal cage. In front of her stood a helmeted villain, who let out a deep laugh. "Foolish girl! Your silly little yo-yo is no match for the power of Magneto!"

Chat Noir gasped, before laughing. "Somebody's been reading too many comics!" He swirled his stick, getting ready for the battle.

"You!" 'Magneto' quickly turned around, eyes widening at the sight of the hero. "Prepare to be pummeled!" He held his hands up, and a dozen cars took to the sky, ready to be thrown at the feline hero.

Ladybug gasped. "Chat Noir! Be careful!" she warned, gripping the bars of her cage with fear.

"When am I not, my lady?" asked the boy with a chuckle, before running towards the comic book villain, scanning for weakness.

Magneto shouted, and began throwing cars at Chat, one by one, all narrowly missing the boy. He began to throw street lamps, signs, lights - anything that was metal, he used as a projectile.

Ladybug struggled to escape her prison. "Lucky charm!" she cried, or tried to, but her yo-yo could not get enough altitude. She growled, kicking at the bars futilely.

"Ladybug, stand back! Cataclysm!" Chat Noir raised his hand, and ran at the bars, corroding them to release her.

"NO! You will not escape!" Magneto's attacks became more frenzied, he threw more things, ripping even the barest bits of metal to launch at them.

The bluenette jumped around, agile on her feet. "We can't keep this up forever - cover me, chaton!" She ducked into an alley. "Lucky charm!"

Chat Noir gasped, seeing his partner flee, and Magneto got his opening. The feline found himself wedged between two cars, trapped. His stick was out of reach... He was hopelessly stuck, and Magneto, floating on a metal platform towards him, knew it. "Ladybug!" he shouted.

"Coming!" the girl yelled, the object wedged under her arm.

Magneto took the hand with Chat's ring on it, and began to slide it off...

Ladybug gasped. She didn't know what to do with the object yet, and there was no time to move. She turned away. No, Chat Noir needed privacy. She would not know his identity.

"My lady! Look!" he shouted.

She turned around to see Magneto gone, replaced with some teenager with a horrible Magneto costume. The akuma floated out of his unbroken helmet. "Where am I?" he asked.

The girl stared, before remembering she had to catch the akuma. She promptly did, and released the little butterfly. "Bye bye, little butterfly... Miraculous Ladybug!" she threw the object into the sky and looked at Chat Noir. "How did you do that?"

He shrugged. "It wasn't me, I can tell you that. One second he was sliding my ring off, the next he's not akumatized anymore. I don't know what to tell you."

Ladybug grabbed her chin in thought. "Hmm... That's weird, that hasn't happened before..."

Chat Noir's ring beeped. "Sorry, my lady, I have to go. Make sure this kid gets home!" Without looking behind him, he raced off, back to his dad's place.

* * *

"Nooroo, dark wings, fall," Gabriel said, and his costume vanished.

Natalie cleared her throat. "So, it was you, then? I saw it on the news." She explained.

He nodded. "I know what I'm doing, Natalie... How is Adrien?"

"Gone." She lowered her eyes. "He must have snuck off while you we were in here. He wasn't in his bedroom, or the kitchen, or anywhere else I could think of."

Gabriel's eyes narrowed. "I see..."

* * *

Adrien jumped through the window, and closed it behind him. As soon as he touched the couch, he de-transformed. He let out a yawn.

"That was a close one!" Plagg admitted, with a chuckle.

The blonde boy nodded. "At least it wasn't like Christmas..." He lowered his head, remembering how his dad had acted on that day.

Plagg gasped, and quickly hid, a moment before Gabriel walked in.

Adrien stared at his dad. "Hello..." He awkwardly waved.

"Adrien... Do you remember what I said before?" Gabriel asked, in a condescending tone.

The boy slowly shook his head. "Sorry, father... I don't."

"I said I wanted to show you something... Something important. Can you keep a secret?" The man offered a smile.

"Wha... What is it?" asked the boy, eyebrows shooting up.

He smiled softly, ruffling his son's hair. "I'll show you..."


	2. Chapter 2

(A/N: If you listen to the song "I'll Be Good" by Jaymes Young, you'll see where my inspiration for this came from. On with the story!)

Adrien was led by his father into his study, before they approached the abstract portrait of his mom. Gabriel showed hesitation, biting his lip. He glanced at his son, who was confused but curious.

"Adrien... This is beyond important. I need you to promise me something." Gabriel said, brow drawn together, serious.

The blond boy nodded. "Yes, father?"

Gabriel took a deep breath. "You can't tell anyone what I'm about to show you. This must remain between you and me. None of your little friends can know... Got that?"

"Yes, father." Adrien answered, still beyond confused.

The man nodded. That was enough... For now. He let go of Adrien's hand and pressed a series of buttons imbedded in the painting, to the boy's surprise, evident by his gasp. In a second, the circular platform that blended into the floor that was secretly holding them up fell, and rose again, bringing them to a different room.

The chamber was large and circular with a large window that opened when they came in. The window, too, was circular, and had a butterfly-like pattern, and let in blue light that illuminated the room with a strange feeling.

"Wow... Where are we?" asked the boy, spinning around with a wide smile on his face.

Gabriel chuckled. "I call it... The butterfly room. Do you like it?"

The blond quickly nodded, before frowning. "Why is it called the butterfly room?"

The man smiled. "I'm glad you asked," he said, and pressed a secret button with his foot. In a moment, what seemed like a hundred white butterflies fluttered into the room from little crevices.

Adrien gasped and smiled, watching them swirl around him. "There's so many..."

"It is remarkable, isn't it? This place was your mother's favorite... She could sit in here for hours, watching them fly. She took such good care of them..." Gabriel sniffled, lowering his head. "I don't have the same touch as her. Under my care, they don't seem the same."

The boy looked at his father, tilting his head. He looked around for a second. "Wait... Why is this place a secret?" he asked, looking into his father's eyes.

The man swallowed. This was it. This was the moment, the make or break. He narrowed his eyes. "Where did you go? You weren't waiting for me, like I asked you to." He turned to his son.

Adrien's eyes widened. "W-well, Nino needed someone to study with, and I thought I might-"

"That's not the truth, is it?" Gabriel asked, shooting his son a dirty look.

The blond boy gasped. "Well, no-"

"I need you to tell me the truth, Adrien. Where did you go?" the man asked, never breaking his stare.

He lowered his eyes. "I... I went to go see the fight between Ladybug and the villain, Magneto."

"Wasn't Chat Noir there?" Gabriel asked, raising an eyebrow.

"W-well..." Adrien swallowed. "He was..."

The man put a hand to his head. "Adrien, my son... Do you really think you can hide it from me? I know the truth now."

Adrien gasped, eyes widening. "How?"

"Well, it doesn't help that you transformed in front of a camera," Gabriel said with a smirk. "Even though you are Chat Noir, I will always love and accept you. I only hope you can do the same for me..."

The boy frowned. "Even though? I thought you'd be proud to have a superhero for a son..."

"Of course I'm proud of you. But... It makes things a bit more complicated," Gabriel admitted.

Adrien narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean?"

He lowered his eyes. "It's... It might be better if I show you. Nooroo, dark wings, rise!" he called, and began to transform.

His son watched, eyes widening. He scrambled backwards, falling on his butt. "No way," he whispered, in disbelief. "No way, no way, no way-!"

In seconds, his father had been replaced with the villainous Hawk Moth, who was much taller and intimidating in person. But he seemed disappointed as he stared at Adrien. No, that wasn't the word... There was sadness in his eyes. He lowered them. "I thought you would understand..." he muttered. His voice echoed into silence.

Adrien could only stare. "Father," he murmured, voice breaking with emotion.

Hawk Moth growled. "Nooroo, dark wings, fall." He transformed back into Gabriel Agreste, and fell to his knees.

"Master!" cried out the little purple kwami.

The man coughed, before standing. "I'm fine..."

"Wait... What's wrong with you?" asked Adrien, slowly standing up. He stared at his old man with disbelief. His father was Hawk Moth... It was crazy how one little fact could turn your world upside down... And he knew he was Chat Noir! No doubt he would demand that Adrien give him the ring, and-

"Adrien," he said, putting a hand on his son's shoulder, and staring into his wide eyes. "I'm fine... And I know this must be a shock to you... But I told you because I trust you. I need you to trust me..."

The boy's eyes narrowed, and he took a step back, forcefully removing his dad's hand from his shoulder. "Trust you? You're Hawk Moth! A supervillain! You hurt innocent people every day - you're a monster!" He pointed at his dad's chest, anger in his eyes, in his heart.

Gabriel looked taken aback, eyes widening, before he began to tear up, looking away. "I want to change, Adrien... Help me change. I want to be a better man..."

He slowly shook his head. "No, I won't. I know what you are now... And I'm going to tell everyone! You're horrible, horrible, horrible-"

Gabriel Agreste tuned out. He stared down at his hands, wondering how anything could have gone so south. Could he redeem himself? His son didn't seem to think so. And if he couldn't... What would he do? Go back to being a supervillain? In his heart, he didn't think he could do that anymore. Adrien continued screaming at him, face contorted with rage. But Gabriel didn't hear a word. All he heard was his own guilt, his own regret. He fell to his knees, staring at his stupid hands. How could he have done this? He was a monster. A monster!

A sob escaped Gabriel, and Adrien hesitated, eyes widening with shock. In seconds, his father was sobbing on the floor, devastated by his own consciousness - a thing he had shoved deep down, and had just returned at that moment.

The man might have been Hawk Moth, but he was Adrien's father first. The boy ran to his dad. "Father!" he cried, staring at him.

"You hate me," the man was able to wheeze out. "You hate me..."

Adrien looked away, guilt sinking in. "I... I guess I just don't understand... Why would you do any of this? Why... Why would you become this? Is it... Is it because of me?"

"Adrien!" Gabriel gasped, shaking his head. "No... It's your mother... I believed, if I could have the power of the Miraculous, I could bring her back... But I failed in that, too. I'm not just a bad guy - I'm a _bad_ bad guy." He sighed, and looked at the floor, using a handkerchief to wipe away the tears from his cheeks.

The boy stared at his emotional broken father. "Oh... You just missed her..." he muttered.

The man let out a dry laugh. "Miss her?" he asked, as if it was a joke. "She was my night and day. My sun and my moon... My everything. Without her, life has no meaning. What was I supposed to do? I didn't have a moment to prepare. I wake up one day, and she isn't there... Just gone, not a single thing to indicate where she'd gone."

The blond boy slowly nodded. It made sense... Finally, things made sense. "And then you wanted to get her back... So you sought the miraculous."

Gabriel slowly and sadly nodded. There was nothing left to say for the shell of a man.

"Hey," Adrien said, suddenly hugging his father from behind. "I'm sorry. I understand now... And I think I change my mind. I think... I want to help you become a good guy."

The man gasped, and slowly smiled, turning to hug his son back. "Thank you, Adrien... That's all I could ever ask for from you."

* * *

They spent the next hour asking and answering questions, providing explanations and apologies where they were due. Gabriel admitted that what he did was horrible, and he did not enjoy it, while Adrien admitted he thoroughly enjoyed what he did.

"Maybe we should switch," Adrien joked, smiling.

In the end, things seemed alright. Plagg and Nooroo even got to chat and play around. Finally, it was time to go to bed, as evident by Adrien's frequent yawning.

Gabriel smiled at his son. "I'm proud of you, Adrien. You're the best son I could ever ask for... I'm sorry for being so distant. I was afraid... That if you knew the truth... You wouldn't accept me as your father." He lowered his eyes.

The teenager shook his head. "You were wrong. You're my father, no matter what. Even if you were a supervillain in the past..."

An awkward silence ensued. There was a question in the air that no one wanted to ask. A question that could destroy the last hour's worth of work.

Finally, Adrien sighed. "You want my ring now, don't you?" the boy asked, timidly eyeing his father.

"No, Adrien... Not anymore. It's useless without Ladybug's, and if I were to send out another akuma, well, then I wouldn't be a good guy anymore, would I?" He sighed. "I've accepted that I'll never get them or my wife back... You should go to bed, Adrien. It's very late. Oh, and, remember your promise."

The boy looked confused, before remembering. "Right... Can't tell anyone. No problem... Except, uh, how do I get out?"

The man chuckled, and pointed to the center of the room. "There's a secret button on the floor. Tap it with your foot, and you'll find yourself in my office. Goodnight, Adrien."

"Goodnight, father," the teen said with a smile, before leaving the room to go to his bedroom. He laid on his bed with a sigh.

"So, your father is Hawk Moth..." Plagg said, trying to make conversation.

Adrien shook his head. "Not anymore..." His eyes widened. "Wait, if Hawk Moth isn't around anymore, then Ladybug won't show up anymore, either!"

Plagg chuckled. "Then make your move on her the next time you see her. When you do patrol. Plus, you've got at least a week before someone notices!"

The boy let out a sigh, shaking his head. "I can't tell her... She doesn't want to know my secret identity, and I can't tell her that Hawk Moth is done, because she'll want to know how I know..."

"Hmm... Well, you could try to figure out her secret identity, right?" the kwami asked.

Adrien yawned. "I don't know... I think I'll sleep on it. I have time to figure out things, right?" He shrugged, and turned on his side, closing his eyes before Plagg could respond.

The kwami only shrugged in response.

* * *

"You did the right thing, Gabriel. I'm so proud of you!" squeaked Nooroo.

The man was on his hands and knees, staring at the ground. He wrestled with his consciousness. Was telling Adrien the right thing to do? If he wanted to get the miraculous, no. He couldn't back out of this good guy thing now... Could he? Of course not. He sighed.

The kwami frowned. "I think this place is making you upset..."

Gabriel knew what the problem was. He still had one foot in the water. He took off his miraculous, and said, "Nooroo... I renounce you." The butterfly kwami gasped, before being pulled into the miraculous. He put the brooch into a box, and put the box on a table in the lair. He promptly left the lair, to his office.

He approached the security screen. "Lock my secret lair," he said, after pressing a button.

"Locking... Hang on," cheerfully announced the computer. "...Your secret lair is locked."

He sighed. "Excellent..." If Adrien made the outlandish claim that he was Hawk Moth, there would be no way to tell. The lock made it so there was no way to access the room without unlocking it first, and the unlock required a password.

Gabriel walked to the master bedroom, and approached the bed that was too big for just him. He sighed, crawled into the covers, and whispered to the empty side of the bed "Night, dear," before attempting to drift off. But the dreams, as they always did, stopped him.


	3. Chapter 3

Gabriel Agreste had been haunted by the dreams since he picked up the butterfly brooch. They came every night, every time he tried to sleep. Nooroo described it as one of the side effects of using the miraculous for evil.

The dreams weren't like normal dreams. They were realistic, surreal, and terrifying.

Gabriel laid awake in bed, eyes opened wide, trying desperately to sleep. But he could not.

 _"Once a monster, always a monster,"_ echoed Chloe's words, but not her voice. He knew that voice too well...

"No," he whispered, slowly shaking his head. He stepped out of bed. There she was. She wore white heels, and a blue sparkly dress. Her hair was blonde, like Adrien's, and her eyes... Those eyes stared at him, piercing like daggers.

She gently put a hand to the maroon stain over her heart. _"How... How could you do this, Gabriel?"_ she choked out, staring at him, in disbelief.

He shook his head, taking a step back. "No..." he muttered, eyes wide.

 _"You killed me..."_ she whispered, in a cruel way. Those words tormented him, echoing in his mind. _"yOU KILLED ME!"_ she shouted, angry, voice breaking.

"I didn't mean to!" he cried out, tears beginning to stream down his cheeks.

She let out a laugh, a dark, mirthless chuckle. _"Excuses! You killed me... You monster,"_ she whispered, getting closer.

He found himself against the wall, staring into the eyes of his wife. He felt like he was choking, what could he say? He couldn't say anything. He could never redeem himself. "I'm trying... I want to bring you back, but I'm trying to move on..." he whispered, staring into her torturous eyes. He blinked away tears.

"Gabriel," she said softly. _"Don't even try. I know what you are... A killer... YOU KILLED ME!"_ she screamed, the words ringing a thousand times, as her face got so close, those eyes, those horrible eyes-

And then Gabriel awoke, sitting straight up, gasping for breath. Like always, his cheeks were wet from tears, and his body was drenched with sweat. He lowered his eyes, and looked to his wife's spot in the bed. Empty, as always. He got up, and decided he would spend the night in his office, coming up with some new fashion designs he didn't care about. Adele was the only thing on his mind. She took up all of his thoughts. But first...

He peeked into Adrien's room, and found the boy fast asleep. He smiled. At least one of them was sleeping peacefully. But then again, Adrien wasn't using a miraculous for evil.

The human soul is incredibly fragile, Nooroo had explained. When a miraculous is used for evil, it does damage to the human soul that can take a lifetime to heal, or never heal at all. It can turn someone into a shell of who they used to be.

"Well, I guess I already am," Gabriel muttered bitterly, as he walked down the stairs, in an endless train of thought.

Then he saw her. Out of the corner of his eye, the quick movement of her blue dress, and then when he looked, he found she was not there at all. Another thing. The hallucinations... Sometimes he'd hear a whisper of her voice, or see her, and think she came home somehow. But it was always just his corrupted heart, playing tricks on him.

"I'll be a better man today," he vowed, staring at the portrait of her. "I swear it... I'll be good, I'll be good."

She showed no sign of having heard him. Of course, she was a painting.

He let out a shaky sigh. "I love you, my dearest Adele..." he softly spoke, as if loud words would break her. He sat in his chair and began to do what he set out to do - design something. Maybe he could fool himself into thinking it mattered. But that rarely happened these days.

* * *

Adrien yawned, stretching, as he woke up to sunlight.

"Finally! You're awake!" Plagg cheerfully said. "So, since it's Saturday and we have the day off, why don't you go try and find Ladybug?"

The blonde boy shook his head. "I'll wait for patrol tonight. I have a plan - I'm going to tell her to come to a certain series of rooftops at sunset. I'll have a surprise romantic dinner set for just the two of us!" he exclaimed, smiling at his kwami.

"What if she says no?" the cat creature asked, cocking his head.

"I'll tell her it's very important. We'll have dinner together, and then I'll ask her to reveal her identity to me. I'll promise her I won't tell anyone, cat's honor!" He grinned.

"And what happens when she says no?" he asked, rolling his eyes.

Adrien shook his head. "Then... I'll tell her I love her, and I need to know."

Plagg let out a sigh. "This can only go well..." he said with sarcasm. "She's gonna say no, kid! You either have to stop being a gentleman or let go."

"Then I'll treasure the last few moments I can spend with her, and try to make them last as long as I can. Besides, it's not like she's going to disappear for good. We'll still be around to prevent fires and rescue people and stuff!" He smiled at his kwami.

He slowly shook his head. "She'll talk to you, and say, 'Chat Noir, I think Paris is mostly safe now. Us heroes aren't needed anymore, so goodbye!' and then she'll leap away and you'll never see her again!"

Adrien looked immensely distressed, staring into space.

The kwami's eyes widened. "I was just joking, kid! It probably won't be that bad..."

"That bad? Plagg, what am I supposed to do? I have to respect her wishes... She doesn't want either of us to know each other's identities... Maybe I can convince her that in case of emergency, we could have each other's cell phone numbers or something?" He ran his fingers through his unruly hair. "That might not even work - and without Hawk Moth, we won't have anything to do, and she'll stop showing up, and then I'll be really alone!" He fell over on his side.

"Calm down, kid! Pull yourself together! Ladybug is a smart girl. She'll do the right thing..." Plagg desperately said, trying to convince his master to chill out.

The boy gasped. "Wait! You've seen her - you have to tell me who she is! Please!" he cried, holding Plagg in his hands.

The kwami shook his head. "No way. We're bound by a sacred oath - we can't reveal anything about the current miraculous holders, no matter how much we want to."

Adrien just about deflated, falling face forward on his bed, groaning. "I'm never going to learn who she is... And she'll never love me the way I love her!"

"Oh, Adrien..." Plagg said. He was no good with this emotional talk. That was Tikki's forte. He groaned. What was he supposed to say? Tell the kid that his crush might not reject him? He didn't know. He looked around, as if one of his surroundings might give up the answer. Unfortunately, they did not.

* * *

"YOU KILLED ME!"

For what seemed like the fifth time, Gabriel awoke, gasping, in his office. He looked around to reorient himself, and sighed. He had fallen asleep amid his half-baked attempts at designing something. Oh, well. The sun was up, and so was he.

The man walked to his son's room, and knocked on the door. "Adrien? Are you decent?"

Plagg floated through the door. "Kid is busy. What's up, Hawk Moth?"

Gabriel let out a low growl. "I just wanted to check up on him... What is your problem?"

"Listen, your son's emotional state is about as delicate as china. A big bomb like the one you dropped last night is gonna mess him up. And since you're not Hawk Moth-ing anymore, that's going to mess him up too. So give the boy some time, will ya?" asked the kwami.

The man took a deep breath. "Fine. That's fair." He paused. "I was wondering... How long should it take for the visions to go away?"

Plagg raised an eyebrow, before gasping. "Ohhhhh. Well, if you're truly a good person, they'll stop happening altogether. But I don't really see that happening _. Once a monster, always a monster."_ In a split second, the kwami's voice shifted from his normal to Mrs. Agreste's.

Gabriel's eyes widened. He swallowed hard. "I... Make sure Adrien is safe, okay?" he muttered, before rushing off. He put a hand to his face, and found blood. A look in a nearby mirror confirmed it - a nosebleed. Another symptom of his meddling in the darkness.

He stepped into his bathroom and slapped water on his face, staring into his own eyes. Was he a monster for good? No, he thought. Adrien forgave him, didn't he? But would anyone else? Would Ladybug, if she knew? Would his wife?

Blood dripped into the sink, down the drain. He blew his nose into a tissue, and was amazed at the amount of blood that ended up on the cloth. He disposed of it, and looked himself in the mirror again - those cold, blue eyes. They revealed no emotion, just like always.

He felt his left nostril start to gush again, and quickly took care of it. Indeed, the side effects of his abuse of power were numerous. Dreams, hallucinations, nosebleeds, and...

He gripped his head, as suddenly everything became to bright and too loud and too much. The rushing water, it was like it was in his ears, in his brain, thunderous! He fell to his knees. His least favorite part - the migraines.

These reasons were why he couldn't go out in public. Not because he spent all day in the butterfly room, waiting for someone to get upset (that too), but because he wouldn't be able to handle it. Between the sleep deprivation that came from the dreams and the rest of things, he would be unpresentable.

He missed his costume, he realized. Whenever he was suited up, miraculously, none of these things happened. Nooroo called it "an absence of humanity", that when Gabriel was transformed, he temporarily was soulless. Whether he though that was true or not was a question Gabriel himself hadn't answered.

He gripped the brim of the sink, focusing on his thoughts. He glanced at his reflection, and there she was, staring back at him.

"YOU KILLED ME!" she shrieked, and the mirror shattered.

Gabriel fell to the floor, in a fetal position, as a reaction. When there was no sound, he stood back up, and found the mirror intact, and his wife gone. He sighed, lowering his eyes. There was no escape for him.

But the truth was, the hallucinations started long before he picked up the miraculous.


	4. Chapter 4

Adrien Agreste didn't normally spend his Saturdays in bed, but this was a rare exception to the rule. Gabriel understood, and cleared the boy's schedule. Natalie regularly checked in on him, making sure he was okay.

"You do realize you're free to transform, right? You don't have to stay in here like this." Natalie said, raising an eyebrow.

The boy frowned. "What?"

She cleared her throat. "Your father says it's fine if you leave, just remember his rule. No telling anyone."

"Wait... You know? Do you know who he is, too?" he asked, gasping.

Plagg whispered "oh no."

"...yes. Anyway, you're free to transform. Don't feel restricted to the house." Natalie sighed.

"Thank you, Natalie, but... I think I'm going to stay here." Adrien admitted, with a forced smile.

She nodded. "Of course. Do you need anything? Perhaps some Camembert?"

Plagg gasped. "Yes yes yes-"

"No, I'm good. I think I want to be alone right now," he said with a sigh.

Natalie lowered her eyes, pushing up her glasses. "Alright. I'll check back in an hour, okay?" After a nod in response, she simply shut the door.

"Why did you reject the Camembert!?" exclaimed the cat kwami.

The blond boy shrugged. "I dunno..."

Plagg approached his master, looking him over. "Uh oh... Don't tell me you're lovesick."

"I just can't stop thinking about her..." he whispered, gently touching a picture of Ladybug.

The kwami rolled his eyes with a groan. "Great... Why don't you try and find her, then?"

He slowly shook her head. "I don't know. I'm afraid... That she'll reject me."

Plagg swallowed, glancing at the floor. "Try telling her how important she is to you... How much you love her. That might work, right?"

Adrien stared at the ceiling, a sad look in his eyes, like he just saw someone kick a sick puppy.

"Aw, man..." muttered Plagg. "I'll be right back, Adrien!" he floated through the door and raced through the hallways, searching until he found him - Hawk Moth himself. Well, not right now. In fact, right now, he looked pathetic.

"Yeesh, what happened to you?"

Gabriel looked at the kwami carefully. At the moment, the man's nose was plugged, to stop the bleeding, and he was crying. He wiped at his tears. "I'm fine... Is everything alright? Is Adrien okay?"

Plagg shook his head. "No, man, you're really messed up. I can see it now - your soul, that is. It's like someone decided to take a big bite out of it, and leave a dose of poison behind. That's bad..." he said softly.

The man growled. "That is obviously not what you came to talk to me about. What do you want?"

"Adrien... He's in love with Ladybug, as you may or may not know." the kwami hesitantly began to explain.

Gabriel raised an eyebrow. "So?"

"If you stop sending out akumas, he won't be able to interact with her anymore. There won't be evil to fight, so Ladybug will stop showing up as much, before she disappears altogether," he said.

The man's eyes widened. "Oh, no, you're not asking me to do that. I will not go back to being a bad guy... You said yourself that my soul is messed up. I will not ruin it even more just because my son has a childish crush on a superheroine!"

Plagg shook his head. "Couldn't you just have Natalie do it, then?"

"No! Nobody is using the butterfly miraculous any more. I won't condone it. I'm sorry, Plagg, but my son will have to get over himself," the man hissed.

"It's not just a childish crush. You should see the way he looks at her - he's enamored with her, with her personality. And she won't tell him who she really is!" the kwami exclaimed.

Gabriel lowered his eyes. "I'm sorry. That isn't my problem, Adrien can figure it out himself."

The cat creature sighed, "fine. But know that you're not doing that broken soul of yours any favors by ignoring your son's pleas for help!" He then zoomed back to Adrien's room, to find the boy hadn't moved an inch.

"Plagg... You ever think about death and stuff?" softly asked Adrien, unshed tears in his eyes.

"Oookay, we're getting you out of her. Say claws out! One way or another, we'll get Ladybug to understand, right?" he asked, anxious.

The boy shrugged. "I dunno..."

"Well, you should be on patrol right about now, and what's gonna be weirder, you not showing up, or you confessing your love for her? ...it's the first one. Come on!"

Adrien didn't answer, staring into space.

Plagg growled. "Say claws out already, damn it!" he shouted.

The blond boy shook his head. "What's the point? She'll never love me..."

"You are so dramatic... But then again, I can see where you got it from. C'mon, Adrien... Just say claws out!" the kwami's voice broke, as he pleaded.

"What difference does it make? Adrien or Chat Noir... Ladybug doesn't need me. She doesn't love me..."

"Holy crap, if you don't get out of bed right now and saw the freakin' catchphrase, I'm gonna be really mad and not talk to you!" Plagg whined, pushing his owner's side futilely. "C'mon, kid, get up..."

* * *

Gabriel stared at his reflection, gently touching his perfect face. Plagg's words rang in his ears. Ignoring his son's pleas for help... Was that really him, Gabriel Agreste?

"Of course it is," whispered a voice he knew all too well. He tensed, and turned around, to find himself alone. Of course he was alone... He had locked Nooroo away and shut Adrien out, and Nathalie knew better than to intrude...

He was alone. He stared into his own bright blue eyes. Adele could fix this, couldn't she? If only she were here... He looked down.

"If I went back, would she forgive me? Would Adrien?" he wondered aloud. "Would it even matter?" he whispered, his look slowly becoming even more tormented. Their opinions on his actions... They wouldn't heal his broken soul. What would? What could? For that, he had no answer.

He pressed a button on his watch. "Natalie, would you please try and cheer Adrien up? I'm going to... Study." He took a deep breath, and slowly let it back out.

"Of course, Mr. Agreste," she promptly and obediently responded.

He nodded, and left the room, going to his office.

He stood in front of the picture of Adele, and gazed up at her with adoration, before opening the painting and revealing the safe inside. He reached for the peacock miraculous, but hesitated, before deciding to take the book. He opened the book up and began to study it, specifically on souls... There had to be some information in this book about how to heal his broken soul, yeah?

As his eyes skimmed over page, over page, over page, he began to realize that even if there was something in here, he probably wouldn't even be able to read it. He was frustrated, but couldn't help but keep searching for the answers he wasn't even sure existed.


End file.
